Hey, beauties! Long time, no talk. I know it's been a while since I've posted but I'm back!
What on Earth is "self-love". If you're a woman, I'm sure you're familiar with the term. But do you practice it yourself? We as women often fall victim of "sleeping on ourselves". In other words, putting ourselves last.
Today I wanted to touch on this subject a little, seeing as we just wrapped up February (aka the "month of love"). I was approached by a sweet blogger friend of mine, Janine, from glasshalffab.com about doing a self-love interview blog post. I IMMEDIATELY fell in love with the idea! Self-Love is something I've really tried to become more conscious of lately, so what better way to bring attention and recognition to it than a dedicated blog post! So, to kick off what I'm *hoping* will turn into a Self-Care series on Gracefully Gold, I'm answering a few questions on self-love! Thanks so much to Janine , again, for including me in this amazing tagged post! Also check out these other beautiful blogger babes that participated in the #SelfLoveClub tag as well!
What made you realize you were "sleeping on yourself"?
I think the main reason I realized this was because I noticed myself being tired, cranky, and impatient with the smallest things. I noticed myself feeling unsatisfied and annoyed at things that weren't worth the energy. I was so used to being in a negative fog that it was just becoming who I was.
What is the biggest thing that caused you to "sleep on yourself" in the past?
I think the biggest component to this is just lack of confidence and passion in myself. I didn't think I deserved to be happy with myself. I didn't think I was worth the extra time and effort to care for myself. I thought that if I did these things, that meant I was taking away from caring for loved ones.
How has "sleeping on yourself" had an effect on your life?
Sleeping on myself has effected my life in numerous ways. One being that I was overweight and unhappy with myself for years, but too wrapped up in stress and negative energy to do anything about it. Another way it drastically effected my life was in my personal relationships. I was neglecting my husband and my family and often lashing out at them due to my own insecurities and lack of self-love. Lastly would have to be motivation. I had no motivation to find a creative outlet for myself, which in turn caused me to feel even more unhappy due to the lack of creativity.
Do you have any insecurities that people actually compliment you on or see as something positive?
Oh, definitely! I hate to just talk physical aspects, but definitely one of my biggest insecurities has always been my thighs. I've always had what I view as "bigger" legs than most girls my size, and those have always been a huge issue for me. I used to hate them. In fact, sometimes I STILL catch myself cursing them. But I can't even count the number of compliments of received about them throughout my life. Lol!
Why does self-love matter?
Self-love is so incredibly important! I firmly believe in the saying "your vibe attracts your tribe". If you're constantly putting yourself down and not loving on yourself, you're going to attract others around you that only magnify that. This just creates a vicious cycle. In order to be the very best version of you, you have to love and respect yourself and know your worth! You cannot get where you want to be in life without knowing your worth and knowing what you DESERVE.
Why do you think people tend to doubt themselves the most?
I think has a lot to do with the society we're raised in. It's imbedded in our brains as young people to overachieve, strive for the next best thing, and never sell ourselves short. While all of these are great in theory, the examples that are set for these are not attainable for every person and that has never been made clear. We, as a society, need to focus less on what is perfection, and more on what WE as INDIVIDUALS view as achievable goals for OURSELVES. We need to bring awareness to the fact that everyone is different and that this is OKAY. Loving yourself is OKAY. Taking time for yourself is OKAY. Not getting it right the first, second, or even third time is OKAY. What is NOT okay is talking down on ourselves, pushing ourselves to breaking points far too often, and not knowing or acknowledging our limits as human beings.
What do you do to uplift yourself when you're feeling down or not good enough?
I feel like this is a tough question to answer because there are so many things that I do depending on the situation. If I'm having a bad day and nothing is going right, sometimes the only thing I really need is a good cry. Other times its an hour long bath with a glass of wine. What I do make sure to do every time though is remind myself of where I've been and that I'm so much happier than where I was before. I remind myself that it's okay to have an off day, but that I have to keep going. I am important, so if I am not feeling my best, I can't function at my best. If I can't function at my best, then I can't give others my best. These are the moments where I know I need to step back and take a little time for myself instead of running ragged.
What would you tell others that are sleeping on themselves and their talents?
I think I would tell them what I find the most interesting about them, ask them what their passions are, and ask them what is holding them back. I think if you ask people those types of questions it sticks with them. They start to wonder exactly how to answer them, and then they start to crave the changes they need to make in order to answer them without hesitation.
What is your favorite quote/scripture you'd share with other people that are lacking confidence and not believing in themselves?
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleanor Roosevelt. This quote has stuck with me for years and I never truly understood it until recently. Basically, you are the only person standing in your way of being awesome and loving yourself. What others say cannot make you feel inferior unless you ALLOW them to.
What other advice would you give to someone who struggles with self-love?
I think my only other advice would be to just be nice to yourself. Take it easy. You are only human and until you are willing to accept that, you will never be satisfied.
That concludes my interview! Don't forget to check out the other amazing blogger babes that participated in the #SelfLoveClub tag as well! XOXO, Hailee